My Studies on Crap
Hello.
Today I want to talk about craps and shits. You know, it feels so good when you finally release a chunk of hard brown feces. The sensation is absolutely glorious.
I have complied a list of the different types of shit.
Hard Crap
This is usually the first crap that comes out of your rectum. It is hard, yet supple, and has a nice texture and consistancy. Unless you're constipated, this crap feels lovely when it slowely exits your bowels. Usually, the colour is a nice dark brown. And if you hadn't had enough fiber for the day, there should be some chunks of last night's tuna or cabbage floating around
Gooey Crap
This crap is special. It usually happens when you ate something bad or something that didn't agree with your stomach. It usually comes after a Hard Crap. It usually gushes out after a Hard Crap. It feels nice sometimes, but usually, it feels gross, cause it is wet. The wetness sometimes makes you cringe, and many people mistake this kind of crap for diarhea, which it is not. After you wipe your sagging ass and look inside the toilet bowl, you can expect to see a murky brown water, with pieces of food here and there. Not appetizing in the least, but yes, It does look like chocolate.
Bumpy Crap
Just the word brings tears to my eyes. Bumpy Crap is bumpy. It hurts when it goes down your colon. Sometimes, it can tear holes into your colon, and then you'll get infected, which will most likely lead to untimely death. It hurts a lot. Bumpy Crap is usally formed by a low intake of fiber, and a lot of sharp foods, like non-chewed crackers, and swallowed pieces of carrot. Try to chew your foods harder and longer, and eat some of that fiber shit, so that you don't have to experience Bumpy Crap.
As you now may know, I am an expert on shit and crap, and everything in between. I have studied poop my whole life, and I am pleased to share this information onto you.
Happy Pooping!
Song of the Day (STD)- "Goodbye My Lover"- James Blunt
Today I want to talk about craps and shits. You know, it feels so good when you finally release a chunk of hard brown feces. The sensation is absolutely glorious.
I have complied a list of the different types of shit.
Hard Crap
This is usually the first crap that comes out of your rectum. It is hard, yet supple, and has a nice texture and consistancy. Unless you're constipated, this crap feels lovely when it slowely exits your bowels. Usually, the colour is a nice dark brown. And if you hadn't had enough fiber for the day, there should be some chunks of last night's tuna or cabbage floating around
Gooey Crap
This crap is special. It usually happens when you ate something bad or something that didn't agree with your stomach. It usually comes after a Hard Crap. It usually gushes out after a Hard Crap. It feels nice sometimes, but usually, it feels gross, cause it is wet. The wetness sometimes makes you cringe, and many people mistake this kind of crap for diarhea, which it is not. After you wipe your sagging ass and look inside the toilet bowl, you can expect to see a murky brown water, with pieces of food here and there. Not appetizing in the least, but yes, It does look like chocolate.
Bumpy Crap
Just the word brings tears to my eyes. Bumpy Crap is bumpy. It hurts when it goes down your colon. Sometimes, it can tear holes into your colon, and then you'll get infected, which will most likely lead to untimely death. It hurts a lot. Bumpy Crap is usally formed by a low intake of fiber, and a lot of sharp foods, like non-chewed crackers, and swallowed pieces of carrot. Try to chew your foods harder and longer, and eat some of that fiber shit, so that you don't have to experience Bumpy Crap.
As you now may know, I am an expert on shit and crap, and everything in between. I have studied poop my whole life, and I am pleased to share this information onto you.
Happy Pooping!
Song of the Day (STD)- "Goodbye My Lover"- James Blunt
yea that bumpy crap hurts.
doritos will do that 2 you.
lol.
nice post
Posted by
Anonymous |
4:32 PM
eeeeewwwwwwww
Posted by
Anonymous |
11:05 PM
i would like to see a complete crap lexica. i dont think that the 3 crappers are all that is there. i mean, there are what was it, 130 kinds of snow, there must be more in crap too :p
nice topic! may i call you captain craptard? :D
Posted by
Anonymous |
2:05 AM
Ughhh.... you are so sexual... Make my vagina tingle with orgasmic pleasure that vibrates my clit when your penis digs hard into my squelching back cunt. OoooooOOOOooooh....
Posted by
Anonymous |
5:09 PM